A Real Vampire
by Bri Nara
Summary: Just before a Halloween party in a abandoned manor, America calls Romania out on his vampire costume. Saying it didn't look 'real'. Now Romania plans to show America exactly what a real vampire look like... Crack, Vampire!Romania, multi-shot special.
1. Not a real vampire

**United States of Hetalia Productions**

_This is a random idea that came to me after Romania's official design came out. One of the comments on Livejournal said he pretends to be a vampire to scare America or Italy, and I thought... "Hm... Halloween fic with Romania scaring the crap out of America as revenge for Twilight... Perfect!" I started this months ago and waited until October to post it. Warning: This is a parody-ish thing of horror movies because I **suck **at horror.  
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_Romania: Bri doesn't own Hetalia. Or me. She's mostly guessing my personality._

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><p>It was Halloween. Halloween <em>day, <em>at least.

The nations were planning to go to a costume party later, so most of them were already in costume.

After America the Cowboy finished his speech, he looked around at all the cool costumes around the room. England was a sorcerer , France was a butler, Japan was a ghost, Hungary was a witch, and... then he reached Romania.

Romania was wearing a long black cape over his trench-coat, his eyes were blood-red, and his fang seemed bigger.

"Dude, what are you supposed to be?"

Romania looked up at America as if the answer should've been obvious. "I'm a vampire."

America let out a laugh. Everyone in the meeting room turned their attention to the laughing American and the confused Romanian.

Romania tilted his head to the side. "What's so funny?"

"You forgot the glitter!"

"Glitter?"

"Yeah, vampires are sparkly, and hot, and nice, and stuff."

Romania crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow. "Oh really?"

Everyone was giving America looks that said 'YOU IDIOT! O_O YOU DON'T MENTION TWILIGHT IN FRONT OF ROMANIA!' Except for Hungary. She looked about ready to laugh her ass off.

"Dude, when you come to the party, try to show me what a _real _vampire looks like!"

Romania looked like he'd been slapped across the face. But then the look got replaced with a mischievous grin. "Of course."

The meeting ended. Some nations left, talking with excitement about the party that was going to happen later. Some dashed out with a quick over-the-shoulder-glance at Romania.

Romania just sat there with an mischievous grin and a plan forming in his head.

"Oh trust me, America. I'll show you what a _real _vampire looks like."

**Me: What could Romania possibly be planning? X3**

**Romania: How fun will this be? ^_,^**

**America: Why are we trusting Bri to write a multi-chapter fanfic for Halloween this year? o_o**

**All three: (ghostly) Who knows~?**

**Romania: Review~.**


	2. Disaster at the party

_Me: Apparently I'm not the only one curious as to how this will turn out. ._._

_Romania: 'How this will turn out'? Didn't you think of an ending?_

_Me: Yes! I thought of an ending this time! I just think this fic will be sliding all over the Funny vs Creepy scale._

_Romania: Bri does not own Hetalia. She does, however, rent the abandoned house the party is in._

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><p>There was music, candles, and pumpkins everywhere.<p>

England had managed to find some old house to set the party up at. They didn't even need to put up fake cobwebs.

The party was a blast... until America caught sight of Romania.

He was still in his black cape and trench-coat. Both of his eyes were glowing red. And his other canine tooth got as long as the other one.

"Dude! I thought I told you to show me what a _real _vampire looks like! This looks nothing like Twilight!"

The room fell silent. Romania only scowled. Romania walked up to America.

"You _honestly _think that those sparkly _pixies _that one of your authors made up are really vampires?"

"Of course."

Romania's eye twitched. Then his annoyed look got replaced with a smile once more as he leaned towards America. "Oh well. You leave me no choice." Romania said into America's ear. "I'll just have to remind you what vampires were like before Twilight~."

Then the lights went out. And about two seconds later, two screams ripped through the air. The moment they ended, the lights went back on.

Romania was gone.

"Angleterre? _Angleterre?_" France cried. "Mon dieu, he got Angleterre!"

"Wait a minute... where's Canada?"

"Who?"

"Canada! He's missing too!"

The remaining nations looked at America for a moment before running to the front door.

"OH CRAP!"

"VE~! THE DOOR'S LOCKED!"

"IT'S HALLOWEEN, ROMANIA'S IN PISSED-OFF-VAMPIRE MODE, WE'RE LOCKED IN, AND I WON'T GET ANY DAMN CANDY! WE'RE ALL SCREWED!"

"WILL ALL OF YOU SHUT THE F_ UP?"

Everyone looked at the Hungarian with her arms crossed.

"Romania won't do anything to you! He'll only attack those he's pissed off at!"

"I cut him in line at the snack machine. Does that count?"

"No, Romano."

"Hungary!" America said. "You know how Romania works. Help me save England and Canada."

"Ah. He's using the hostage plan. What did you do to piss him off on his favorite holiday?"

"I pointed out how his vampire costume sucked."

Hungary smacked the back of his head. "IDIOT! WHERE THE HELL DO YOU THINK DRACULA COMES FROM?"

America thought for a second. "Ohhh. Transylvania's in Romania, right?"

Hungary facepalmed.

"I'll help." Netherlands said.

Hungary and America raised their eyebrows. "Why?" they asked together.

"I have nothing better to do."

Meanwhile in a study...

The only thing that lit the room was the fireplace behind the armchair.

Canada glanced nervously from England to the Romanian in the armchair.

"Why did you bring us here, Romania?" England asked.

"Simple." Romania set down his glass of red wine. "I need to teach our friend, America, a little lesson."

Canada's eyes widened. "A lesson?"

"Da. It would be much easier if you two help~."

England raised his eyebrows. "And _how _do you suppose we help?"

Romania got up from the armchair and grinned. Both of his fangs were gleaming in the firelight.

"I have a pretty good idea on how."

**Me: Dun dun duuun. XD**

**Romania: You suck at suspense.**

**Me: I-I knooow. D:**

**Romania: (Vampire-grin) Review~.  
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	3. Haunting Hallways

_Me: (*headdesk*) Sorry this took so long! DX No matter what I did, the chapter wouldn't come out creepy so I was like 'Screw it! This is gonna be a comic relief chapter like everything else I write! Damn it!' (*continues ranting*)  
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_Romania: Bri does not own Hetalia. If she did... why are you making me creepy in this fic? ;,,; You're scaring away my fangirls._

_Me: Relax. I can't write creepy well, so I won't scare off too many. -_-_

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><p>"Great. Just great."<p>

In front of them, the hallway of the mansion split into three.

"Should we split up?" Netherlands asked.

"Are you _nuts_?" America asked. "Haven't you _ever _seen a horror movie? You don't split up a group!"

"Chicken." Hungary deadpanned.

"I am not a chicken!" America shouted. "Fine! Split up."

First with Hungary...

"Heheheh... I should have expected _you _to get involved."

Hungary's eyes widened as she turned around. She was face to face with an upside-down Romania grinning at her.

"Hellooo~."

"Eep!"

BLAM. Romania fell from the ceiling and Hungary had a frying pan in her hand.

"Ow. Was that really necessary?"

"Let's see... crazy kidnapper with fangs pops up behind me on Halloween... HELL YEAH, IT WAS NECESSARY!"

Romania laughed. "I'm not crazy! I'm just having a bit of Halloween fun."

"Halloween fun?"

That's when there was a scream in one of the other hallways.

"See? Looks like America saw one of my new 'drinking buddies.' ^_^"

Meanwhile with America...

America was nervous. The hallway was dark and he could hear every creek of the wooden floor under him.

"America?"

America squinted into the darkness ahead of him. Standing there was a figure in a black cloak with red eyes.

"Romania?"

"Of course not, you git."

The figure stepped out of the shadows.

"England? What did he _do _to you?"

England pointed at the fangs poking out of his mouth. "Do you mean these? This is Romania's way of making a point."

"A point?"

England walked towards America with his fang bared. "Sorry about this."

America let out a scream and ran like the wind. He was _not _going to be vampire food.

"Haha. Romania was right. That _is _funny."

**Me: (*Bangs head against a wall over and over*) What the hell was I thinking when I decided a multi-chapter this year? DX**

**Romania: (*sweatdrops*) Review...? ^^;**


	4. Oh Brother

_Me: Fine. This is a comedy with a pinch of creepy. Hopefully this will be done by Halloween. If not... uh..._

_Romania: 'Next year's special will definitely be a one-shot?'_

_Me: Yeah, what he said. I don't own Hetalia. If I did, would I be doing the fanfiction tradition of putting a disclaimer up?_

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><p>Running towards Hungary was America. He looked thoroughly freaked out.<p>

"That's my cue to leave." Romania said behind Hungary. "Bye bye~."

"Wait-!" Too late. He was gone. And America grabbed onto Hungary's arm. "What _is _it, America?"

"ENGLAND JUST TRIED TO _EAT _ME!"

"...What."

"Romania made England his vampire minion! And he _tried to freakin' eat me._" America started rambling. "I wonder, would I taste like burgers? Probably. Then Iggy might be enlightened by the awesome taste of hamburgers and want more! I'm _so_ screwed! And-" SMACK. "...Thanks. I needed that."

"Can you put me down now, eh?"

"Not until you tell me where Romania is."

Hungary and America saw Netherlands with someone slung over his shoulder.

"Look who I found," Netherlands said.

"Who?"

"Canada...!" the person whined.

"Canada!" America grabbed his brother. "Open your mouth!"

"What?"

"Open your mouth!"

Canada blinked before he obeyed. There were fangs. Of course.

"DAMN YOU, ROMANIA!"

"What, eh? O_O"

"THAT VAMPIRE-BASTARD MADE MY BROTHER A VAMPIRE MINION THAT CAN NEVER EAT PIZZA AGAIN! DX"

"Huh?" Canada reached up to feel his canines. "HOLY MAPLE. O_O"

America put Canada down. "He's going down."

Netherlands held out a stake. "You're going to need this." Then he pulled out a garlic clove. "And this."

"...Why do you have those?"

"I'm dressed up as Van Helsing."

"Ohhh."

Meanwhile in the ceiling...

Romania and England were looking down at everyone.

Romania looked at England. "He's not _really _going to slay me with that, right?"

"...If he _still _believes there are monsters in the closet when I only joked about it _once _about _300 years ago_, there's a chance he might do it."

"...Crap."

"You want to stop scaring him?"

"...Not just yet. We have an audience to please."

"Hungary, Netherlands, and Canada?"

"...Sure. Let's go with that."

**Me: I'll try to finish this on Halloween! I will! If not, there are a few countries with their Halloweens on the first days of November, so I'm good!**

**Everyone: (*Sweatdrop*)**

**Romania: Review~!**


	5. Showdown

_Happy Halloween!_

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><p>The door to the study got kicked open.<p>

"ROMANIA!"

The vampire looked up at the pissed off American at the door. He got up from his armchair and smiled.

"Hello, America. Do you want to admit that classic vampires are a million times better than Twilight?"

America gave Romania a serious look. "You mean you locked everyone in this creepy-ass house, turned my brother and my lov- I mean, England into your vampire minions _JUST_ BECAUSE I WAS EXPECTING TWILIGHT WHEN YOU DRESSED UP AS A VAMPIRE?"

Romania crossed his arms and pouted. "Well, yeah. I'm the country where Dracula comes from, so when you say my vampire costume sucks it's like saying you make a crappy Superman."

"Don't bring Superman into this! Superman doesn't do _this_!" America grabbed Canada and pointed at his fangs.

"But don't fangs look cool?"

"That's it!" America pulled out the wooden stake and ran at Romania.

Romania slid to the side. "It's going to take more than that~." Holy crap! O_O He was going to slay me with that! This guy's freaking crazy!

"Suck on these then!" America threw garlic right into Romania's face.

"What the he- I mean, AAAGH! DX IT BURNS! IT BUUUUUUURNS!" Romania dramatically fell to the ground. "OH WHAT A WORLD! DX FAREWELL, SLAYER!" Romania shut his eyes and stuck his tongue out.

"Holy crap... I KILLED A VAMPIRE! I REALLY AM A HERO!" Then he looked at Canada. "But how do I turn you back to normal?"

From the floor, Romania rolled his eyes and snapped his fingers. He went back to playing dead after Canada's fangs disappeared.

"Victim turns back after the vampire dies? That's new."

"Who cares? Let's go look for England! I have to tell him how the hero saved him!"

After everyone left, England came out from behind the armchair. "You can stop playing dead now."

Romania sat up. "That was fun~."

"How did you get rid of those fangs?"

"I'm in the Black Magic Club for a reason~. Can we do this again next year?"

"Why the bloody hell-"

"Pleeeease?"

"Fine. =_="

"Yay! Let's go get some candy downstairs~!" Romania grabbed England and dragged him downstairs.

After a near-battle-to-the-death at the snack table, everyone agreed it was the greatest Halloween trick ever.

** Me: It's finally over! T_T**

**Romania and America: (*Noms on candy*)**

**Me: ^^"**

**Romania and America: REVIEW~! ^_^ (*Throws candy out to the audience*)**


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